My hand turned me down
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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