he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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