You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Randomize
