a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
