Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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