I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Randomize
