Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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