I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
farters have to be the big spoon...
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
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