i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Randomize
