in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
I'm really busy with my period
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