someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
