worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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