think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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