i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
We were destined to go to rehab together
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
