i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
