I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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