brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
