i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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