my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
