So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
