Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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