he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
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