You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
