They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
