I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
