I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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