The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
