Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
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