so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
