Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize