was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Randomize
