i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Randomize