Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
