The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
