New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Randomize
