Whod you bang
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
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