What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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