Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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