the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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