I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
do herpes really smell.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
