just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Randomize
