i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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