beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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