How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize