My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Randomize
