I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
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