I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize
