She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
