I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
