I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
they're like a gay fantastic four
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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