i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
did i just pee glitter
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
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